Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
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