How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
Randomize
