Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Randomize
