she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
