i permit you to call me
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
im on a boat
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