i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
