I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
You left your phone here
Wait...
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