please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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