I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
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