and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
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