I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Randomize
