belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Telling her that my penis is called megatron was not a good idea for a first date.
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
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