we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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