Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
