Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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