so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize
