i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Randomize
