i don't plan on having that self control this summer
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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