Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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