Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
Randomize
