Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
vagina is talking i cant
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
Randomize
