70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
