If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
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