you guys were way drunker than both of me
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
So. Much. Porn.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize