I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
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