It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
Randomize
