btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Randomize
