It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
