I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
My brain says no but my pants say off.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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