Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Randomize
