I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
Im part way to drunk.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
and eventually we just all took our pants off
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize