i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize