Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
Randomize
