think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
