And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
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