do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
