Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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