Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
