we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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