Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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