I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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