; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
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