17 year olds will be the death of me.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
