it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
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