I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
There are leaves in my underwear?
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
