well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
Randomize
