I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
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