I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Randomize
