i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
