wrigley field is MILF paradise
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
The uberlube is also flammable
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Randomize
