HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize